Friday, 24 April 2015


Yesterday, 23rd April 2015, I was making some personal errands in relation to some payments that I was expecting.  Somehow, when I reached the offices I was rushing to, to make the follow-up, I found out that my claim was still waiting some approval.  As much as I knew I needed that money and that it was still not ready, I told God to give me peace of mind and wait for His time.  I was happy to know that it had passed all the stages it needed to pass for approval.  To me I do not take that for granted as that far, God had directed it and followed it to that level.  The remaining part I told my God, I will not make a follow-up anymore as I did not trust the people I was dealing with, but because God was involved, it took that very short period of time to reach to the level it was.  I said I will now relax and leave it to God to finish it for me in any case He has been directing and moving it in every step.  What I needed to do is to make follow ups physically so that if I needed to do something in person I would do as all the times He told me to do that, I found I was needed to make a personal signing and confirmation which I did in two occasions and I will tell you for sure I just followed what I felt being told in my heart by the Holy Spirit.  That is why I love listing to Him. So, I left the office and went my way.    

As I was leaving that office to go back to my working station, I felt so hungry as I was wishing I had money to just sit down in a cafe in town and take a cup of tea.    Unfortunately, the money I had in the pocket I could not try to do that as I was thinking, that is what we will use in the house with my children that evening.    While walking in the streets to reach a matatu to take me back to the office, I felt someone poking me in the streets and I wondered who is this poking me?  When I looked at him I saw it was a former colleague I worked with sometime back in one of the Ministries.  Then he asked me ‘Rose where are you going on a hurry.’  I told him, ‘I just sneaked out of office to take care of an errand and now I am rushing back to the office.’   Because it is someone I knew very well and I was very sure he would not judge me or brush me off, I jokingly told him ‘I thought you are calling me we enter this cafe here so that we have a cup of tea.’  Do not forget that is what I wished in my heart earlier.  He got my point and immediately he told me ‘Rose, I won’t mind having a cup of tea with you.  Let’s go and have it.’ I was very excited as God answered my immediate need there and then.  It was such an awesome time.  But while sharing my story about the errand, he asked me, ‘Why can’t you talk to so and so because he is the boss there and he knows you?’ I told him, I heard him being mentioned by one staff, but because the last time I met him in an office he treated me so badly, I did not want to face him again.  Let me just leave it to God He will do it for me.’  Immediately I finished saying this he said, ‘I am so sorry Rose, you mean he mistreated you?’ I told him ‘yes’.  Then he started narrating to me how he also mistreated him badly.  But he was excited that God was dealing with him.  I asked him how God was dealing with him.  He told me, that the guy is terribly sick.  Actually he was telling me the last time he saw him, he looked so weak and it evidently indicated from his lips.  I felt so sorry for the person.  Then I remembered how he was frustrating me and pinning me down.  I told God in my spirit, have mercy on him and all those that always treat others bad.  I felt pity on him.  I said in my heart, if there is anything God would want me to do, then, i would do it.  But then, i realized it is something beyond me.  I still told God to deal with the issue personally as my prayer for him.   We finished our cup of tea and we bid each other goodbye.  I could not stop thinking about this man and his sickness.  I asked God, ‘might you be punishing him for the way he has been a stubborn person to many people including me?’  I did not get any answer from my Lord in relation to that.  But that issue kept on disturbing me.  Anyway I brushed it off and decided to look for a friend in one of the buildings I passed through, as some time back, we were together in an office and it has taken more than 4 years since we met last.  I popped in that office after i was cleared by the security officers and at the customer care desk, I said I want to see Esther.   Immediately the customer care officer gave me directions to where her office was and I went there running.   The first office I entered I asked about her, they told me she does not work in that office, I prayed to God to allow me get Esther because I really wanted to know how she was fairing as I had earlier looked for her with no success.  Immediately I finished praying that prayer in my heart, a lady jumped in the conversation that Esther does not work there and said, ‘You are looking for Esther Mueni?’  I said ‘yes’.  She said, ‘follow me I will take you to her office’ I said ‘yes!' to my Lord that He has again answered my immediate prayer. I entered the office she directed me to.  Let me tell you, immediately i opened the office the first person my eyes met was Easter, when she lifted her head up to see who was opening the door she found it was me.  She could not sit down anymore but woke up and gave me a very big hug.  I felt so sweet that she appreciated my presence.  Her next sit had a lot of vouchers she was working on.  She removed all of them to give me a sit.  I was very excited for her gesture as it indicated to  me she was excited to see me and wanted to fellowship with me.  I felt so encouraged and loved.

I took my sit comfortably and as usual I started encouraging and reminding her where we are from and this far the Lord has brought us.  She gave me her stories of success and failures, and how God has been faithful to her in both good and bad.   I equally gave her my testimony.   I asked her if she tells her stories to others because her testimony was so powerful. She told me, ‘Rose, I stopped telling people my story because majority did not believe me and some thought I am boosting’  I felt her so much because most of the time when I give my testimony too, instead of many getting encouraged, majority feel jealous, intimidated, frustrated, filled with anger why it is not them and so on.   The few that I bless will always come to me and tell me that I have blessed them and they needed that encouragement.  So, I encouraged her and told her not to give up.  God will give her the right environment to share her testimony.  We continued with our conversation as she told me stories of many whom we worked with who went to be with the Lord and I could not believe it as I never heard about them.   ‘Immediately I started thanking God for the gift of life He has given me’ I started telling myself in my heart, ‘If I am still alive then God wants me to do many things for Him.’  At that very point I felt down that we are no longer with those friends.  I started mourning them and feeling so bad about them asking God, ‘why?’  The Lord did not answer or say anything in relation to that.  I kept quiet and immediately we finished our other stories, I told Esther, ‘it is now the time for me to go we will meet again.’  We exchanged numbers and we called it a day.  

While I was walking to my matatu pickup point, I starting asking the Holy Spirit, ‘Why are you giving me all these new information about all these people I was working with in the past?’ The Holy Spirit started telling me things about these people.  Some were positive and others negative especially about the first man I was told about.  I started praying and asking God to speak to me.  He reminded me of a statement I read in the morning from one of my friends who had written in her wall this.  ‘The Lord will fight for me and I will hold my peace.’  To be honest, this friend has never treated me well in my entire encounter with her.  I respect her so much as she is a woman of God.  But I have always felt there is something that God has to deal with her in relation to how she treats some people including me.  Then I asked God, ‘for such a person, who even knows you Lord, and works for you, do you still vindicate them because they know you very well and you know them very well, yet  they are doing something wrong?’  This time round the Lord answered me and said ‘I love everyone with all my heart and I am ready to vindicate everyone.  But, I will always vindicate those who will vindicate others whether they know me or they do not know me.’  I was very excited and thanked God for the many times I have fought for others, I have done many good things to others but I am always repaid with evil.  I am not trying to blow my own trumpet here, but I want to say, many times I am rejected, betrayed, intimidated, frustrated, pinned down and so many other negative treatment.  I have gone back to the Lord and cried so much to Him and asked Him to fight my battles and my pain.  Let me be honest, when I am going through the pain of rejection, betrayal, intimidation and others, that is not a very good place to be.  But I have always found myself praying so earnestly to my God to fight for me.  For sure I do not want to scare anyone, but i will point it out, those who do that to me, God has always punished them in one way or the other.  I will somehow meet someone and they will start telling me about the persons with all what they are going through.   I would cry to the Lord asking Him to forgive them as I never rejoice when my enemy is suffering or is being punished because the Lord I serve, has never taught me to revenge, but He has always taught me that He will always vindicate me.  My Lord has also taught me not to hate anyone even my enemies, but has taught me to love them even when they hate me, but along the way He will save them and deal with their weaknesses as they will come to a realization that what they do is wrong and they will hear to his word and repent.  I know loving an enemy is not a very easy thing.  But the Lord will enable you to do that.  What am I talking about?  I am saying, I don’t need to be a bad person so that people can know I am bad and start getting scared about me and treat me like a king or queen but out of fear that I have instilled in them.  But, I should do good and tell God to fight for me my battles and while I am doing that, I should praise and honour Him as He remains God.  God will vindicate you but still He would want you to pray for your enemies and help them even in time of need.  When they are going through their pain, God allows you to pray for them so that He can forgive them their trespasses as He forgives you.   Today, I choose to pray for all my offenders and tell God to ease their burdens and call them to Himself so that they can know Him deep and better.  In so doing, I know they will stop rejecting others, intimidating others, frustrating others and betraying others.  Do you feel like me?  I want you to make a prayer and pray for all those that have hurt you, including me if I have ever hurt you knowingly or unknowingly and leave us to the Lord.   God of heaven will forgive all of us and we will start a good and sweet fellowship with Him and ourselves if He allows it.   As I know God has always taught me my many lessons when I wrong others.  He has given me instructions on what to do when I have done that (wrong) by asking for forgiveness or rekindling a relationship that was dead because we offended each other.  He has done many other things to me in a way of correcting me and I have always listened to him and taken every correction positively.    

Do you want God to vindicate you, please vindicate others and our good God will always vindicate you and lift you in front of your enemies and make you a blessing to those who vindicate you.  I hope I have ministered to you in relation to your vindication and vindicating others.  God bless you and may He do you good.

Monday, 20 April 2015


Today I woke up very late.  But I realized I was struggling with a dream that was somehow long and very detailed.  Gosh, when I woke up, I thanked God it was a dream because to me it looked so real.  I could not really understand what I was dreaming about, as most of the people I was seeing in the dream majority of them are people that I do not talk to, others are relatives, others are very senior people serving in the Government and others were faces that I could not see and tell exactly who they really were.  This dream was like a long story being told in one book but had messages for different people.

But, when I started asking God all about this jumbled up dream though very detailed with all these characters with their different needs, I could not get what God wanted me to do with it.  Instead of getting disturbed about it I started praying in my heart asking God to interpret the dream for me.  I dream dreams and I love my dreams as some, God uses them to speak to me.  I will confess that God usually uses good dreams most of the time and not the bad ones.  This is not to scare you about my dreams because we dread bad dreams that really come to pass.  Actually when I get a bad dream I always wake up, pray about it and it ends there.  The dreams that God has used to speak to me to, always are not scary ones, though they are deep and detailed. Sometimes He can tell me instantly what the dream was all about and others He tells me about them much later as He confirms them to me at His own time.  When I talk about dreams I should make everyone reading this that, I am not a diviner, dream teller, or any other person that people relate with in relation to dreams.  I am just sharing a general story about a dream I had yesterday as I know we all dream and others do not dream.

This dream was so intense and when I was just praying in my heart about the dream, I was just going about my chores in the morning in preparation to go to work.  I started visualizing how I will have a nice and heavy breakfast after I made so sweet Mandazi for breakfast the previous night.  My mouth was salivating.  While I was just thinking about it, still praying in my heart, the Lord reminded me that today, I am supposed to be praying and fasting.  Oh my!   I remembered I had asked myself, how will remind myself that on Thursday (16th April 2015) that I should be fasting?  Earlier on before this reminder, I wanted to put an alarm on my phone.  But I guess because of my busy days’ I forgot about it.    But then I was like, ‘Oh Holy Spirit thank you so much for reminding me about my praying and fasting today’ (16th April 2015). This is because I had totally forgotten about it.  May be I would have remembered much later in the day when I had already eaten and I would have really felt bad for forgetting.   This reminded me that, that is the work of the Holy Spirit to remind, guide, direct and even tell us of what is expected of us on daily basis.    That is why He is our helper most of the time in all what we do.  I said again carnally as you know the things of Spirit and body really fight each other as in they do not agree most of the time.  I said in my heart, “oh no this fast should not have come such a day when I am so hungry and I needed to do justice to my well-made and delicious Mandazi’s.   Anyway, the struggle did not take long as the Lord gave me the energy to go on with my fast.  I took it positively and stopped thinking about the eating and focused more on the Holy Spirit so that He speaks to me.  Then He said, “Now that you are praying and fasting today, I want you to pray for all those people you saw in your dream.  Whether they are your friends, enemies, relatives or whatever they are.   Just make prayers for them.  I want you stand in their gaps as I want to do something new in their lives and I have called you as my servant to pray for them.  If you ignore then, I will not do it for them.”  I was like really?  Then, I called my elder son and told him the dream so that he can tell me what he thinks about the dream. 

I was shocked by my son’s thinking.  You would think we were thinking about the same thing.  What really shocked me are the verses that he quoted for me while we were talking.  I put them all down and all of them had the answers for my prayer in relationship to the dream.  The verses were Psalms 37:1-2, Psalms 37:5-6, Psalms 125:1, Psalms 127:1, Psalms 43:5, Nehemiah 1:11, Romans 8:1, Romans 8:6-8.   After we read all these verses together I asked my son, ‘how did you remember all these verses when I told you about the dream.’ He told me while he was in school there are some verses he was reading and took them so deeply and he remembers them so well and they really related with the dream    but he did not know he would use them one day.  I prophesied to his life that he will be a mighty servant of God as there is no way a 18 year old boy would quote all these verses if God was not in his life.  I could not hide my joy that I am happy that the Lord will use him so mightily.  Immediately I told him that, the Lord told me, ‘I made him remember all these verses that he had taken so deeply to minister to you as a way of confirming that I am with you and what I am telling you to do during this time you are praying it will come to pass’.  I started crying and asking God to direct me.  My son really encouraged me and told me that God also uses me so mightily and I should focus on Him.  We left it at that and I said I will take  time to pray and fast and take it very serious and do exactly what the Holy Spirit is telling me to do.  That is why I came up with this question,   ARE YOU PRAYING FOR OTHERS AND YOURSELF? 

Most of the time, when we are engaged in the many activities we are in, in this world, we do not hear the Spirit of God talking to us.   Imagine He had to bring me a dream in order to compel me to pray for my relatives, friends, enemies, leaders and those that I did now know.  Meaning, God is in control.  He will always help us and guide us through the Holy Spirit.  I would urge you today, as much as you are busy, make a prayer to some people you could not imagine of, situation, things or anything that the Holy Spirit will prompt you to pray for.  God will always listen to you and He will surely do what you will pray for.  Remember may be your prayer is what is going to turn around something about the people you are praying for, situation or anything that He compels you to pray about. 

May the Lord help you and give you peace of mind, soul and heart as you wait to hear from him.  

Monday, 13 April 2015


As I was growing up, I did not know life had all these lessons for me to learn.  Life is not easy and I bet many will agree with me.  Without going so much deep to all what we go through in life, I have come to realize that God is not a sleep. He is watching and looking at us in all what we do especially our wandering!  When I was small I remember someone saying everyone’s graph is already drawn and God knows exactly what journey you will take and to him nothing catches Him as a surprise.  Remember He has good plans for us all, but because we do not know the plans exactly, most of the time we do our own things thinking that, that is His plan for us.  Usually, we are very wrong.  

I have been there and I am there, and the reason is because I am also human and I have these doubts and thinking that God is doing nothing, that I can help Him as He seem to be wasting too much of my time.  That in short means, I am always impatient and that is one of the catalyst that has made me drug and stagnate for many years.   Lord have mercy on me!  Yesterday, I was in a new church that I am trying to make it home.  Do not question my diversion from the former, because I prayed about it and the Lord said Yes!  What I need to do is to listen to Him more as His instructions were very direct, clear and what i know it is all about me and Him and no third parties here.   This Sunday was my second visit after I was warmly welcomed in the church and I can’t wait to see what God has in store for me. Besides the point,  but a good mention so that when we bump on each other you won’t say, but I thought you are in this chur………. Finish the word for me as in it is not about my church but the call that I have by who calls me in His Kingdom.   Hope that point has come out clearly and if not, then as time goes by, you will understand why I just hope from here to there.   I have come to realize it is not about my hopping but doing what I have been called to do.  Exactly!  Sorry for that bit of information that was not meant to be mentioned here, but I can’t tell, why it had to slip it in here.  So where was I?  OH!  'Yeah' this man of God blessed my soul as he has been speaking to my heart directly and I thank God that He sent me there as in, that is the best place I have been in some days’ of my life.  I know God has good plans for me and that is why I can’t trade listening to His voice, to listening to any other voice, as all those other voices make me either make the wrong choices or doubt what God has already ordained for me, as this relationship is not about any other person, but Him and me of course.    

The Pastor last Sunday gave a story about this guy that they were traveling with to Israel, a trip I have always prayed that one day I will also make.   He told us about this story that touched me so much.    There was this guy who was with the team he was in, and he was the only one who did not have a visa to enter Israel.  He had a visa to a certain point, but not to enter Israel.  As the Pastor narrated the story I found putting myself in this man’s shoes as he kept telling as about their journey and how this brother had so much faith that he would be with them in Israel as much he did not have a visa.   Well, that looks crazy to imagine especially for those people who do not believe they need facts to really believe on anything.  What I know is that, God wants us to have so much faith in Him and not on our efforts as they are very futile.   This guy kept on telling others that he will be with them up to the end of the journey.  And the pastor kept on encouraging him.  I thank God for such people like my new Pastor who believe in unbelievable as that means He is a man of Faith too.  Nowadays to find someone who talks positive or encourages you when you say things that look crazy, to be honest that is God speaking through them.  In this world people are full of negative and faithless.  Nowadays I have decided to be doing my things most of the time without consulting anybody because the people who discourage are the majority.  So, Pastor kept on encouraging this gentleman and when they reached the border, this guy was denied entrance as he did not have any visa.  Back at home (Kenya) there was some delays in processing his visa and he went without the visa to Israel as he did not want to be left behind.  When others crossed the other side, they could not leave but wait for God to do something.  As they stood praying and interceding for this brother, nothing seemed to happen and what they decided to do was to continue praying and trusting in God.  The guy waved at them, reckoning to them that it is over I will not make it but you guys continue and I wish you all the best.   Unbelievably he went back alone.  Now here comes my God, something so drastic happened and I shed tears when pastor was preaching, that,  from nowhere before the man was like 100 meters away from the border, the guys manning that border post received a call from Kenya saying that, that guy’s visa was approved and he should be allowed to go in with the others!!!  Man, I could not stop crying this time I was looking for my hankie everywhere to wipe my tears because of the way I could not control myself with my cry.  As in that is so unbelievable that God, came in such a time of hopelessness.  Why was I crying?  Because God is so faithful even when we think He is not?  That fact that He has not yet given up on me, made me cry as in i could not imagine the joy that man had when the Lord came for him.  He has very good plans for us and what we only need is to have faith like that of the mastered seed and He will do the rest for us.  He has done so many things for me that I do not take Him for granted on what mighty things He can do for me.   Just imagine how God had to make people uncomfortable working behind the curtains to make sure that the visa is out just at the right time for this brother?  To be honest, I will not give up on God.  I will keep on waiting upon him and trust that He will walk me the journey even when I meander and think He is doing nothing just because of my impatience.   

The following Sunday which was yesterday the 12th April 2015, Pastor hit the nail on the head again and showed me, that I am not alone when I wander and meander from my destiny.  Abraham the man God credited as righteous of God, also made mistakes on the way.  Pastor reminded me that not only you and me who meanders because of doubt and impatience, even Abraham did it so innocently.  As much as he trusted that God would do everything for him, he lost some hope somewhere on the way when he was nearing his 100 years thinking God had forgotten him.    He realized that Eliezer would be his heir as years were coming up so fast and he did not have an heir.    Remember God had not planned that Eliezer would be his heir. He wanted his own child from his body to be his heir.  Abraham still wandered and thought may be Sarah’s idea would be God’s plan B for him to inherit him and so Hagar Sarah’s maidservant slept with Abraham so that their dream can come true.  Remember still, that was not God’s plan about Abraham’s inheritance.  But for God to act, he had to make sure, Abraham had no other alternatives or option b, c, and d as we always have.   He had to make him that old and weary so that he can come at the end of the tunnel where he understood in a human language he is finished or rather he was too old to sire a child of his own, as Sarah’s womb too was dead.  To them on human perspective (biology), there was no hope to have their own child.  But remember God had promised him and He is not a man to lie to us.   God always wants you to hit the roof so that you will understand it is not about your efforts but about him as there is nothing that is impossible with Him.  Remember most of the time we are not different from Abraham where we take charge thinking God is too late for us or He is doing nothing to meet us at our  very point of need.  I have personally trusted God for a husband and I have really meandered making wrong choices that have left me hurt, humiliated and thinking that something must be very wrong with me, whereas it is not about me, but about God’s time and plan.   As much as I know I have wandered, I have not stopped trusting my God and believing that something good is still on the way.  I loved the way my Pastor was preaching it and making me really get it that at God’s time, He makes all things beautiful that no one can really fathom or understand.  The most important thing here is having Faith in God and believing and trusting that He will do it for you.  Can I encourage you this day? Do not give up.  Hold on to God and at His own time, He will crown all your hearts desires according to his Will and you will be at peace and surely you will acknowledge God is good to you all times.  Be encouraged today and be still and know that God is in control.  God bless you and have a lovely week. 

Thursday, 2 April 2015


It is amazing how I wake up in the morning fully energized and ready for the day, even when things are not that rosy on my side.  I got the secret and the secret is, to start every morning with God.  I will confess I am not this kind of a person who wakes up early at 3.00 a.m. to pray.  But I envy those people that God has gifted to wake up that early to pray.  I am not totally saying I can’t pray that time, but I want to emphasis I do not do it that often as I guess some people do it daily.  To me that is a gift.    Though sometimes I am woken that time to pray and to be honest, that is a very sweet experience for those who know what I am talking about especially if they do it daily.    My secret though is, I wake up and I  tell God,  ‘thank you for this beautiful day you have given me’ and there after I switch on my Radio and listen to a Christian Radio Channel in my case Family Radio 316, a Kenyan channel, and I get energized by the presenter James Okumu.  The songs that they play make me connect directly to God and that time I do not stop praising and praying throughout until I am out of that house.  I have never controlled by the guilt that many of us have been brought up with, where if you do not wake up, read the word, praise, pray for hours that you have not prayed.  I am not saying doing that is wrong, but we have been crowded by this believe that, when you do that, that is when you have prayed well.  That is a lie from the devil.  We pray daily and every time throughout though we may pause here and there because of the activities we have during the day.  That aspect that you have to wake up and make long prayers to justify that you have prayed is not really the truth though it is a very good thing.   The Bible tells us to pray daily.  Meaning when you read the word, pray, worship in praise, serve others, and adore him and having that personal relationship with him, you are in prayer.  I am not saying praying long hours and exhortation is bad, I am just correcting the fallacy that, doing that is when you become or are seen to be a prayerful person.      I came to realize with my personality I get bored so easily and that is why I chose my way of praising my God day-in-day out so that I am not bored.   My style may not work out for you but I guess everyone feels very comfortable to do their things their own way in order to achieve what they want. I will encourage you, just be yourself and do what you feel best for you to praise and adore God daily and in whatever time.

While in my praise and worship mood, most of the time God speaks to me in that soft voice.  I remember yesterday 1st April 2015; I love quoting dates because I know one day I will come back and refer on the same because usually I write about my testimonies.  Sometime, a few weeks back, I had picked a book from my College Library on Leadership.  I did not have any book in mind specifically to pick on, but I felt in my heart that the book I will pick will be helpful to me in relationship to leadership.  I picked two books, one was LIVING YOUR STRENGTHS, discover your God-given talents and inspire your community by Albert L. Winseman, D.Min., Donald O. Clifton, Ph.D., Curt Liesveld, M.Div.  and the other one is SPIRITUAL LEADERSHIP, by J. Oswald Sanders.  I have not started reading the second book by Sanders, but I can’t wait to finish the current one and embark on the other one which is always in my bag too.     I am this kind of a person who reads one book at a time and I do not peruse the other one until I finish one.  But I am always fascinated when I give myself pressure by having two books in line to read so that I speed read the current book that I am reading.  I have now taken more than two weeks reading my first book but something made me stall a bit reading that book to the end.  In the first pages of the book, one is advised to put a code on Clifton StrengthsFinders 1.0 Assessment at  That code is usually found at the back of the book when you purchase it and it is only meant for one person.  That is, once it is used no one else can use it.  Ok, since this book I had picked it in the Library I was very sure that the code was used and actually I could not tell where the code was.  The code I was trying to put to confirm if it was already used was the wrong one and when I put it at the website, I received a no access message.     I felt frustrated and wished I bought the book myself or afforded buying it online as they informed. My not being able to have the code meant that, I will not enjoy the book fully as I am supposed to know my talents and strengths before reading the other pages of the book.   Well, I felt down, but encouraged myself by sending them a mail so that they tell me other ways of accessing the code.  I got a reply, that, I can only get the code from a book I purchase or purchase it online.  I got even more frustrated as I did not have money to do that.  I promised myself when I get the money I will come back and do the test.  Remember the book was borrowed from my College Library and thus I was to return it after two weeks.  The two weeks elapsed and I had not finished reading the book.  Seven days after the expiry date, I went back to the college to see if I can borrow the books again so that I finish reading them and I was told, I have extended the time with the books and I am fined 60 shillings because of late return of the books.  So I did not mind paying the fine and borrow them again as I had not finished reading the books.  I borrowed the books once more and went my way.  But this time I purposed to read the book even without knowing my strengths but promising myself I will have to purchase the code so that I get to know my strengths.  Before I opened the book, I decided to read the mail that I received telling me how to get the code.  I read it as carefully as it said I should get the code at the back of the book and I should find it intact if no one had used it.  As for me I was so sure that, that book can never have a code that is not spent since it was in the Library but I said let me stop being ignorant and just check for the sake of it.  Guess what?  The code was still intact and sealed.  I could not believe my eyes.  I cut the seal and put the code and thanked God as He kept telling me, ‘Rose, this code was meant for you.  You really wanted it but you did not have money.  The thing here is not about money but about me and you and making you understand, you can do all things through me who strengths you.  I could not believe my heart.   I was confused.  As in God is so amazing and He is always just right there with our answers when He wants to answer them instantly or even later at His own time.  I took the test and let me share this with the whole world as I know many have done the test, my five talents that God has given me in order to serve him are, activator, achiever, learner, input and positivity.  Wao!  What gifts that God has naturally given me.  Now I understand why people do not understand me and criticize me so often and compete with me every time.  I have now understood the competition and criticism is meant to make me work hard because these are my gifts and talents that God has given me freely to serve him and not to be intimidated by anyone at all and feel good for nothing when I listen to the negative criticism and competition that has no fruits.   Most of the time I have given up on responsibilities that God has put in me as I feel so frustrated by my criticizers and competitors who are always there to pull me down until I quit.  I have also realized why I have always struggled to be lead because I am supposed to be leading others and not to be led as I have always shied away from leading thinking I am not good enough because of the criticism.  Now I know.  I thank God for the authors of the book, LIVING YOUR STRENGTHS, discover your God-given talents and inspire your community by Albert L. Winseman, D.Min., Donald O. Clifton, Ph.D., Curt Liesveld, M.Div.  May the Lord bless them and continue helping many people who are willing to know their talents and gifts that God has given them in order to use them to serve Him. 

Remember God can answer you now, or tell you to wait.  His time is always the best.  The most important thing is to be alert and listen to his voice always.  God uses so many ways to communicate to you.     If I ignored what was pushing me from inside, in terms of wanting good from Him, I would have listened to the evil one who tells me you can’t afford, you are good for nothing or this is not meant for you.  As I have always said, anything that tells you something negatively most of the time is not of God.  But that which is always positive is from God.  Let me clarify that from my story, If I depended with my lack of money to purchase the code or my own book which I will buy as I need this book in my library, I would have concentrated on that lack and get frustrated to the point of not even reading the book and because if my focus is always on getting things now and now, then I will lose it.   But because of believing that God will provide and continued reading the book even without the code to know my gifts and talents later, He opened my eyes to see that the code was not utilized as it was meant for me.  He allowed me to be the first one to pick the book from the Library with all those many students, so that he blesses me with exactly what I wanted at the right time and at His own time as you can imagine I carried the book for three weeks without noticing the code was never utilized!  What I am trying to tell you is that, most of the time we wander looking for our blessing all over and may be that blessing is right there where we are.   You are waiting for a miracle to come down from the heaven and you are carrying that miracle with you every day.  Why can’t you ask God to open your eyes so that you can see the wonderful things that He has put in store for you, around you and beyond?  My encouraging words this morning is to tell you ignorance is expensive but if we embrace to love of God without ignoring Him, He will take you and me to places we could never imagine nor think of.  Try Him today and He will not let you down.  God bless you and keep you!